Controlling the Uncontrollables

by Dottie Oleson

Yesterday’s devotional reflected on the question Jesus often asks, “What do you want?” Many times people want power. People want to control circumstances and have power over others. We know that misery comes from trying to control the unpredictability of life as well as misusing power for personal gain. This type of posture of “power grabbing” or “lording it over” (Matt. 20:25) is what Jesus points us away from. The way of Jesus, in contrast, is one of surrender, mutual respect, and humility. After all, “the Human One did not come to be served, but to serve.” (v. 28)

And yet, the stories of Jesus flipping the societal power script typically involve when the person who is ostracized or marginalized regains power in a significant way. Many times, characters in the Bible who “don’t have power” in their societal contexts reclaim power and are praised for it! Here’s just one of so many possible examples: “Daughter, your faith has healed you,” Jesus says to the bleeding woman who so boldly reached out to touch him and courageously shared her story. (Mark 5: 25-34)

When I look at these stories I see people coming into their own agency. People who feel at will to the instability of their contexts are able to shift and find stability and groundedness within themselves. 

I want to share what might seem like a silly sports analogy. Bear with me.

When I used to play soccer, a sports psychologist met with our team. Her advice to us all was, “There are countless things that will happen in a game that you can’t control. It is important to let those go and control the controllables.” The key to this framework was to not get worked up over my own mistakes or the mistakes of my teammates, but to really just take a breath and control what I could control. I could control my attitude and my work ethic. The more I surrendered, had mutual respect for my teammates, and practiced humility (“controlled the controllables”), the deeper my own inner strength and confidence became as a player and teammate. 

We are all in our own process of needing to lean into surrender, mutual respect, and humility as well as finding inner groundedness, agency, and power. My soccer analogy likely will not be able to capture all the deep complexities of power, but I hope it points us to a greater awareness of how power (or lack thereof) plays a role in our own lives.

Wherever you find yourself, take some time to reflect on these questions: How has power played a role in your own understanding of yourself? Where do you see God in your story teaching you to “control the controllables” and lean into surrender, mutual respect, and humility? Where do you see God offering space to come into your own strength, agency, and power?