Making Yourself Small

Yesterday we looked at the disciple Philip and how sometimes the problems in our world or our lives feel just too big for us. Today, we look at the same story but turn to Andrew and how sometimes we just feel too small.

Some time after this, Jesus crossed to the far shore of the Sea of Galilee (that is, the Sea of Tiberias), and a great crowd of people followed him because they saw the signs he had performed by healing the sick. Then Jesus went up on a mountainside and sat down with his disciples. The Jewish Passover Festival was near. When Jesus looked up and saw a great crowd coming toward him, he said to Philip, “Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?” He asked this only to test him, for he already had in mind what he was going to do.

Philip answered him, “It would take more than half a year’s wages to buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!”

Another of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, spoke up, “Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?”- John 6:1-9

If everything outside Philip was too big, everything inside Andrew was too small. The small boy and the small barley loaves were indicative of the small self-confidence, the small faith, and the small thinking of Andrew. But there’s no need to look down on Andrew… because this is us too! I think the invitation here is for us to relate to Andrew and to compassionately invite the Andrew in each of us to find a different way forward with Jesus.

God has provided a resource right in front of him, but Andrew literally says, “but what is this” - he can’t help but dismiss and diminish the small gift God has given. When do you do this? When do you make yourself small? When do you discount your gifts? And when does God’s provision not seem enough?

Take some time to ponder what’s going on in your heart as you think about Andrew and about these questions. And remember, the goal here is not to condemn yourself! The goal is to recover the gift of the small!