Forgiveness as Taking Authority

In the context of forgiveness, Jesus teaches that our decisions have weight. This is how he describes it:

“Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.” - Matthew 18:18

This idea that we actually have real authority in the forgiveness process is so helpful. Too many times, we allow ourselves to remain emotionally entangled with those who have done us harm. We rent them far too much space in our brains. We even decline to set boundaries around common sense things like finances or time or contact. In a word, we forget that we have authority.

There’s something twisted about pain that keeps us tethered to those who caused it in us. And that’s why forgiveness is so important. Forgiveness is about you taking the initiative - not with those who hurt you, but with your own heart (whether or not you reconcile with them is a whole different conversation and is absolutely not required here). As strange as it sounds, but the hard work of truly forgiving - which feels so much like surrender - is at the same exact time about you accepting responsibility to lead your own life.

As you think about these things today and pray about them, let these wise words speak to you:

People often think forgiveness has to be contingent upon something the wrongdoer does — they have to repent, we have to reconcile, we have to restore the relationship, and they have to change. That keeps our emotional process held hostage to another person’s issues. Forgiveness is a way of taking our power back and saying, “I have my own feeling that needs to be done.” - Dr. Chanequa Walker-Barnes