Here and Now - Billy Minshall

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” Matthew 6:34. 

I’ve spent most of my life living in the past or the future. Suffice it to say that if I am spending my life in a future yet to come or living in past regrets, memories or nostalgia, then how am I living right here, right now? 

Future tripping is habitual for me. I have spent most of my life in the arts, and consequently I have had multiple jobs to support my artistic “habit.” Perhaps I always look to the future because of the general instability of my artistic career. I am forever looking forward with worry, concern and a need to control everything that may come! “What’s next? How can I make this work? How can I use my creativity in service to others while simultaneously living an artistic life?”

And what of the past obsessions? Why am I looking at decisions made long ago, bemoaning their consequences, pondering the “what ifs,” lamenting “if only.” What purpose does this serve? Yes, I have learned from mistakes, but there is no reason to dwell in them.

But when I look closer, when I stay in the here and now, I see that everything always worked out somehow. I can see that I have, in fact, been given opportunities to serve others while honing my craft as an actor and writer. I have become more judicious about how I spend my time. I have been fulfilled spiritually by my so-called “side hustles.” And that fulfillment in turn feeds my artistic endeavors and makes me a better actor, writer and a better human being.

So I will try not to obsess about what is long gone, or about what may never come. I will try to move through this moment with gratitude, with some peace and a little joy. There is no "some day." This is it! Here and now.

How about you?