Second Guess Girl
Good Friday Service: 6pm@Lafayette followed by Potluck at Bill’s place
Easter Sunrise Service 6:30am where Claremont Place sidewalk meets the water, in front of 5381 Ocean Ave
Easter Egg Hunt and Brunch: 10am@Lafayette (bring food!)
Easter Service 10:30am@Lafayette
Today we have the gift of a guest devotional from our dear friend Kristyn Komarnicki over at Oriented to Love. She’s trained in conflict management and group facilitation and reflects today on a song that has spoken to her.
One of my favorite songs—both for sheer singability and for lyrics I can relate to with all my heart—is Sara Groves' “Second Guess Girl.” In a series of poignant questions, she lays out before God her doubts, confusion, and double-mindedness with such clarity and vulnerability that the song goes straight to the gut-center of my soul every time I hear it!
Is it time for a speech or for silence?
Are you calling for peace or defiance?
Is this darkening counsel or wisdom?
Are we all perpetrators or victims?
That’s good stuff right there.
Are we companions of Job or prophets of God?
Are we not of this world or just painfully odd?
Is it time for free grace or tough love?
Or a little of all the above?
I don’t know about you, but sometimes I feel confused about what to think or believe, what to do or how to act. Theological arguments stack up on many sides. In dialogue work I get to see both the beauty and the brokenness of humanity…and the glorious imago Dei in each person. Everyone is asking excellent questions; all are coming from a place of truly desiring to understand. Yet everyone lands in different places!
It's a hard world for a second guess girl,
With one hand and another.
I try to take it in but it leaves me spinning
Trying to love my sister and brother.
Yes! It can leave me spinning. That’s why I find Galatians 5 so comforting, so wise, so right.
… in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision counts for anything; the only thing that counts is faith working through love (v. 6). …For you were called to freedom, brothers and sisters, only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for self-indulgence, but through love become enslaved to one another. For the whole law is summed up in a single commandment, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself” (vs. 13-14). ...the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against such things (vs. 22-23).
If I am sometimes not entirely clear on what loving my neighbor looks like, I can always ask myself, “What would I experience as love if the roles were reversed right now?” Would I feel loved if this person gave me unsolicited advice, or if they just sat with me and listened? If they agreed with everything I said, or if they asked me some compassionately curious questions that challenged some of my assumptions? If they told me what they’re gonna do for me, or if they asked me what I need?
Of course, my way of receiving love isn’t necessarily how others experience love (if it were, Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages wouldn’t have sold over 20 million copies!). But I’ve seen enough in my 61 years to know that there are some basic, universal ways that most people experience love. Listening to the “comfort stories” you all share on the opening night of each dialogue, I hear how impactful the simple gift of presence is—someone to be with us, witness our pain, stay with us in our dark night. I hear about the power of silence or of just a few words that validate our feelings, a hug, empathy. It’s not rocket science.
So while it may be a hard world for a second guess girl like me (and maybe you, too), there’s “no law against these things.”
And for that I am truly glad.
With love,
Kristyn