I'm Cooling (By Billy Minshall)

Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.- Matthew 17:20

I’m cooling on God. To clarify, it’s my demands, my expectations of God that are cooling. These days, I am not in God’s face so much. I don’t bombard God with my wants. I guess I am trusting God more. Because of this, I am more calm. I am less resentful. I am less anxious, less fearful. I do not want to say that this is “blind faith” but it is an acknowledgement. I do not always know what is best, or what I need the most. And because I am cooling, or backing off, or trusting, or showing up with a mustard seed, I believe that I can recognize God in the “little things,” in the here and now.

I lead a youth group every week, and every week I worry and fret over the lesson plan. I research  game selections, I try to anticipate the possible hiccups that could occur. I pray (well actually I demand) and I am typically met with silence. And then Sunday happens. Everyone shows up and I wonder how they will interact with one another. Then new people show up, and I worry. What if they don’t want to talk? What if they don’t feel welcome? What if…

But on this day, a new person barrels into the room, jumps right into the conversation and startles all of us. Unexpected smiles illuminate everyone’s faces. Who is this person? Where did they come from? I didn’t anticipate this, but I am so thankful that this person is here. I needed this breath of fresh air! We’re all laughing, and before I know it, our time together is over.

And I think that’s God, right there. I can fret, I can worry, I can obsess. But it is not necessary. God knows what I need, and it’s usually something “simple.” And when I let go, and stop pleading and making demands, I can recognize and receive God’s loving acknowledgement:“Be still, and know that I am God,” Proverbs 46:10.

I just don’t know what it is that I need.  And so I am cooling. I am trusting. I am letting God do the heavy-lifting. 

NOTE: This week we’re shifting to having devotionals only on Mon-Wed-Fri for a while.